(no subject)

[bedlamsbard]

Oh, lovely. Two panic attacks later -- whereinn my roommate had the grace not to comment on the fact I was crying into a lot of Kleenex (there's a reason I bought a fourpack of the box) -- I've now realized that I don't have to worry about gaining the freshman fifteen because I hate going to Bruff Commons -- the cafeteria -- on my own, especially since it's a fairly long walk from my dorm. Must get food to keep in my room, especially now that I have a working fridge. At least I have tea now. *inhales* Even if microwaved boiled water tastes like crap, although that might just be because I steeped it too long. Oh, God, I don't want to be here. Should have gone to Central and lived at home.

Okay. Class. Class number one.

*shallow breaths*

Comments

[snacky]

Deep breaths!

The beginning of the semester is always so stressful, and I'm having flashbacks to my days as a freshman reading this. Hang in there!

[denorios.livejournal.com]

Awww, hon, tough it out. The first few weeks at uni are always rough, but it will get better. I know it's strange and unfamiliar and you don't know anyone, but once your classes start things will get better. Just remember everyone's in the same boat you're in, feeling lost and alone and scared. It will get better. My three years at uni were the best of my life, although perhaps I was more prepared for it, having been at boarding school for seven years beforehand!

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

oh, gorgeous. *Holds out a big hug*

The Association of People Who Seriously Freaked Out In the First Week of College (consisting of myself, kayloulee, and a few other friends of ours who don't actually know who you are but would be standing right here with us if we mentioned it) send you vibes of solidarity.

I promise, you can get through it. Absolutely promise. Also I swear on everything I hold dear that you're not the only one having these freak-outs, and that when it seems like everyone is out conducting practical experiments as to the boundaries between drunk sex and date rape, the geek squad are hiding in corners and quivering. With any luck you'll find each other sooner rather than later. :)

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

Just keep taking those deep breaths, everything will work out. This time next month, you'll be like "DAMMIT I LOVE COLLEGE" and wonder why you were ever worried or nervous.

Tissues will also be your favorite item. Invest in the lotiony ones... more expensive, but when cold/flu season hits, and you're in the dorms? Man, you're going to be feelin' it!

You can go to Walmart and get a toaster for $10 and a microwave for $30... those two things, you can basically live in your dorm, food-wise, and still eat pretty healthy. Toast and waffles in the morning, buy some microwave dinners or whatever...

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

actually, 'cos a) random reassurances don't much help and b) I enjoy sharing my stupidities with the world, let me tell you about my O-Week, about four years ago now.

OK, first thing you need to know is that I'm really good at deferring panic. I can get through tough stuff quite well, if a bit fuzzily. I don't really remember much of O-Week: I remember crying my head off the first night; seeing an old acquaintance on a church club stall on the second day and walking straight up and saying "SIGN ME UP", no preamble, because it was that or fall apart in hysterics at the sight of a face that was a) familiar and b) not trying to give me alcohol; I can remember going to a couple of events and being utterly nonplussed; I can remember meeting my now-best friend, who was having a freak-out, and lending her painkillers; and beyond that I have NO IDEA what I did for a week. Probably spent a lot of time on ringbearer.org and read my textbooks, or something. At any rate, I don't remember it and I don't think it registered at the time because my brain just doesn't consciously register stress, at least not in the middle of it.

Anyway. On the Friday, when everyone else was gearing up to partay some more, I had to go back to Newcastle for a leadership training thing with the church Easter Camp that had been my safe place and mainstay throughout high school. Now, when I get to camps, I usually have a good cry on the first night, whinge to my friends about whatever shit had gone down since I last saw them, and then buck up and enjoy the weekend. On this occasion, I did not. I wandered around kind of numb for the first night.

Woke up on the first morning and found I had forgotten to pack my towel. And my brain broke. I phoned my parents (despite them being two hours away) and hiccuped down the phone line. There was bad reception and they thought someone had died or something (we'd had a suicide in the group a few months earlier, so this wasn't a totally random thing to think). So I flailed a bit trying to explain that no, I didn't want to be picked up, I just needed someone to tell me what the hell to do because I couldn't think for stress, and they were getting up and getting dressed to come out and get me.

Fortunately a good friend of mine, whom my parents persist in thinking is Responsible and Capable, came past and I sort of handed the phone to him and gesticulated until he told Mum that he had everything under control.

Whereupon he turned around to me and said: "so what's wrong?", and I proceeded to wail: I don't know where my tooooowwweelll is! (Entirely unintentional Hitchhiker reference, at the time.)

No one has ever let me live it down, and it is known as the Great Bath Towel Hysterics Incident, and my friends and family remind me at every possible occasion that I am not the sort of Hoopy Frood who knows where her towel is. ;)

Oh, and I then spent nearly TWO YEARS wishing I'd gone to Newcastle Uni and lived at home. Only reason I didn't transfer was that I loved my classes here too much. Things pretty much started to improve from week three, though (by second semester I was sure that it wasn't bad enough to warrant transferring). I hated College (here, University is the academia, and Colleges are dorms, and they're really elite and snobby institutions. Normal people live in share houses) for the first two years, didn't mind it the third, and have only come to LIKE it just now, when I'm about to leave.

Moral of the story is: solidarity in the panic, and if it makes you do stupid stuff, you're certainly not alone in that ;)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Breathing is good. *tries to remember how to do it*

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I'm just really good at panicking. (Meanwhile, everyone else is really good at going out, because this is, after all, New Orleans.)

Thank you.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Thank you. *hugs* I am so glad I have you guys; this time I haven't started crying yet! I'm just staring numbly as Yahoo News talks about Gustav and evacuating New Orleans, which I guess overwhelms the panic about why college terrifies me.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Tissues are awesome. I always have to have tissues; there's a very good reason I bought a four pack of Kleenex at Target.

I do have a microwave; it's attached to the fridge. Now, what can I make in a microwave besides popcorn...

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Well... numbly is better than crying? I think?

Were classes ok?