CSI: NY fic

[bedlamsbard]

So in lieu of, like, working on New York Minute or any of my originals, I wrote CSI: NY fic during school today. I suppose paying attention would also qualify as one of those things I didn't do, which I should probably not do next year because I have Really Hard Classes (like Physics. And Algebra-Trig Honors. And Military History). But that will be then, and this is now.

Anyway, first, a continuation, of sorts of 14-year-old Danny runs away to Tanglewood and Val goes after him. This was written before school, so not technically during school, but...



He knows they think he didn't hear. But he did.

Val hauls him home by the ear, angrier than Danny's ever seen him. Danny doesn't think he'd even bother knocking if Ned Messer's squad car wasn't parked out front. So is Eddie's patrol car, he realizes after a terrified moemnt, when he catches the sheen of sunlight off the blue and white barely hidden behind the squad car's brown bulk.

It's Nate that opens the door, looking disgustingly smug in his red and gold letterman's jacket. Danny resists the urge to punch him in the face. Nate gapes at Val in his expensive worn leather jacket, at Carmine in the driver's seat of Val's beaten to shit Lamborghini, and at Danny's battered face and disheveled clothes.

"What -" he starts to say, but Val cuts him off.

"I want to see my sister," he snaps.

Angela takes the news Danny's run away to join a violent Mafia recruitment gang surprisingly well. Ned does not.

"I don't want him in my house," he growls. "Or any of his fucking gangbanger friends either."

Angela's voice is an agonized wail. "He's your son!"

"Is he?"

Danny, watching from the stairs, sees his mother take a step back as if slapped. "Ned!"

Val, behind her, arches forward with anger behind his chocolate brown eyes. His punch knocks Ned back to the floor. "Don't you dare talk to my sister that way, you son of a bitch."

"Valentine!" Angela snaps. "What the hell are you doing?"

Ned's hand inches toward his service pistol. "How dare you hit me -"

Val trains the gun he's pulled from the small of his back on him. "What're you gonna do? Arrest me? If you don't want Danny I'll take him, and he'll get an education a damn sight better than you could give him. You're welcome to the rest of your blue blood sons, but Danny's mine. Ya' got that?"

"Valentine!" Angela's voice is anguished. "You can't -"

"Watch me," he growls, turning his attention briefly to her. "He'll be better off, Angie." His words are almost a plea. "Angie -"

"My son, Val!"

"And my nephew." He tilts his head back. "Danny! Get down here now!"

Ned Messer crawls to his feet, one hand to his bloody, broken nose. "You son of a bitch. Who the hell do you think you are? Assaulting an officer -"

Val laughs in his face. "I. Don't. Care. I'd like to see you try and make those charges stick. Danny! Get your ass down here!"

Danny scrambles down the stairs. "Uncle Val -"

"Get in the car." He points at the door, and the look on Ned's face is murder.



And then during German I wrote what will probably be the first scene of the first chapter of Bloody Sunday (the last story in the as-yet-unbegun Mac trilogy). What? Ambitious much? Moi?



"Hey, Stella," Danny said, stripping blood-stained latex gloves from his hands and pulling on a new pair. "Where's Mac? Ain't he on this case too? Big one like this, you'd think the brass would haul him in quicker than you can say DNA."

Stella shrugged. "I haven't seen him sice this morning," she admitted. Her eyes drifted to the huddle of guests Flack was interviewing, and two in particular. "I don't have any idea what's keeping him away."

As if on cue, Mac pushed open the door and glanced around, finally spotting Danny and Stella. He came over with a relieved expression on his face. "Sorry I'm late," he said. "I was held up by traffic. What have we got?"

"Desdemona Lysell," Stella said, sweeping the vic's hair back so Mac could see her face, "of Boston, Mass. In town for Thanksgiving. Hawkes is still en route, but she's definitely been stabbed."

"Anyone see the murder?"

"Not that's talking." She inclined her head towards Flack. "In town for Thanksgiving and the grand tour like our vic, came downstairs for dinner and found Lysell on the floor. She was DOA."

Mac glanced toward the witnesses. "I'll go talk to Flack."

"That may not be such a good idea, Mac," Stella protested.

He turned toward her with a surprised expression on his face. "Why not?"

She drew her lips together disappprovingly. "Because your parents are here."



Oh, and this I wrote during Biology. It's okay, people were giving presentations. Danny's brother, the other Detective Messer, makes an appearance.



Danny's mouth twists in an unhappy curl. "Nate," he says coolly, and the detective looks up from the notepad he's scribbling in.

There's only the faintest signs of relation between the two of them. The quirk of their mouths, the blue of their eyes, something in their cheekbones and the quick flurries of their hands. Danny tenses the way he does whenever Flack flinches automatically away from being touched.

Aiden tilts her head back and eyes Nate Messer. He's tall with a lean, wolfish look and fair brown hair, gathering the aura of cop around him in a way Danny has never quite managed to attain.

Nate eyes Danny with narrow dislike and nods politely to Aiden. "Danny," he acknowledges. "You're Burn?" His eyes flick to Aiden.

"Aiden Burn," she says warily. Danny doesn't talk about his family. "Detective Messer, I presume? The other Detective Messer, that is."

He smiles a little. "Yeah, that's me."

Aiden dares a glance at Danny. His face is set unhappily and he looks away from his brother and past the crime tape into the tiny blood-spattered apartment. Aiden sighs noisily, and Danny jumps to glare at her, then his brother.

"What've we got, Nate?" he asks.

Nate gives them the particulars of the case, then follows them into the scene. "You missed Lorelei's graduation," he says. "Eddie was pissed."

"I had a case," Danny replies immediately, the words almost drowned out by the click-whirr of the camera. "Jumper over in Manhattan. We were scraping body parts off of the sidewalk for three days."

Comments

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

oh, Mac. Jesus, boyo. He's *in* for it, isn't he. He's going to wish he hadn't come into to work, and maybe even got into an *accident* in that traffic.

And the Messers. Oh, man. Quite the family--and all sharply individualized. Angela is very much Val's sister, but Danny is her *boy*, her youngest son. And Ned? Ned's got himself an excuse to all the half-conscious knowledge that Danny is not quite his own, not in the way the older boys are. And Val is... dude, I love that scary bastard.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

oh, Mac. Jesus, boyo. He's *in* for it, isn't he. He's going to wish he hadn't come into to work, and maybe even got into an *accident* in that traffic.

I think he's wishing he was unconscious in the hospital right now, and likely to remain so for the next week. Alas, alas, in a few moments his parents will spot him and that will go...not well. Either that or they'll recognize Stella, who they Do Not Approve Of At All.

And the Messers. Oh, man. Quite the family--and all sharply individualized. Angela is very much Val's sister, but Danny is her *boy*, her youngest son. And Ned? Ned's got himself an excuse to all the half-conscious knowledge that Danny is not quite his own, not in the way the older boys are. And Val is... dude, I love that scary bastard.

I'm pretty sure the Messers put the function in disfunctional. Angela kicks ass. Ned is...extremely annoying. I'm sure he's a good father (more or less) to his oldest sons (Eddie, Chris, and Nate) but Danny takes too much after his mother's side, and he doesn't look much like a Messer either. Which, of course, leads to those little doubts. Plus there's Val, who's always around, and Ned sometimes wonders if Angela's really his sister... *facepalm* I seem to be jumping back and forth on the incest line here. It would explain the whole gypsy cab thing because Ned? Hates Danny.

Val is just fun to write, even though he's younger and more trigger-happy here than he is in NYM.

and I am so, so jealous of your ability to write in longhand, it's not even funny.

I feel this is an appropriate time to say that I colorcode by universe, and CSI: NY is pink. Bright pink.

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

Alas, alas, in a few moments his parents will spot him and that will go...not well. Either that or they'll recognize Stella, who they Do Not Approve Of At All.
Oh, Stella. (I think she should like, start reciting a hail mary in Greek or something, just to scare them into thinking she's speaking tongues. But then Mac would like, be doing the head-wall over in the corner). At least she has some awareness of how badly he gets on with his Chromosome Donators, though, so she's not as fazed by them as say... Danny and Aiden will be.

I feel this is an appropriate time to say that I colorcode by universe, and CSI: NY is pink. Bright pink.
Bright... pink... ink? *boggle* Hot damn, you must have one fucking *awesome* lens prescription to manage that.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Oh, Stella. (I think she should like, start reciting a hail mary in Greek or something, just to scare them into thinking she's speaking tongues. But then Mac would like, be doing the head-wall over in the corner). At least she has some awareness of how badly he gets on with his Chromosome Donators, though, so she's not as fazed by them as say... Danny and Aiden will be.

*shudders* I don't even want to think about what Danny and Aiden will think of Mac's parents. Probably something along the lines of, "...this would explain a lot of things." Stella and Mac's parents get along Very Badly. Really, I have very little idea what the hell is going on in Bloody Sunday, which I really shouldn't even be thinking about, let alone writing, since it's supposed to be set up by both Black Monday and Habeas Corpus after the Snafu Trilogy finishes, but I can tell you that at some point Mac ends up in the hospital and Stella yells at Mac's mom. Oh, and Mac's father is the most likely suspect in the murders.

Bright... pink... ink? *boggle* Hot damn, you must have one fucking *awesome* lens prescription to manage that.

*considers pen* Well, I suppose it's not bright pink, the way the pen I wrote Snafu in was, but it's sort of a dark rose. Or maybe a light rose. Of course, I have very neat, very small handwriting. That helps some.

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

Probably something along the lines of, "...this would explain a lot of things."
It really does, however it is they are to him in your fic. (hopefully nothing like what his mother does in my fic. *reassures Mac's inner child*) It's like that old fable goes, about the child's actions reflecting the ways of his parents.

Of course, I have very neat, very small handwriting. That helps some.
Sometime this weekend, I'll scan in a page of fic from my notebook. "small" and "neat" are completely different counties, let alone zip codes, from how I scrawl. ;-)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

It really does, however it is they are to him in your fic. (hopefully nothing like what his mother does in my fic. *reassures Mac's inner child*) It's like that old fable goes, about the child's actions reflecting the ways of his parents.

...I really have no idea, which is why I don't want to write this yet. Although may I borrow his name from you, because I really don't think his parents would name him Macallister. Although you never know.

Sometime this weekend, I'll scan in a page of fic from my notebook. "small" and "neat" are completely different counties, let alone zip codes, from how I scrawl.

This seems to be the case with many writers. Me, on the other hand...everyone I know has looked at my handwriting at least once and gone, "You have really tiny handwriting" or "You write really neat." Except of course on those days when I have handwriting issues, then I can't even read what I write. But it looks cool.

[http://users.livejournal.com/stellaluna_/]

Oh, man. Val *is* a scary son of a bitch, and I really like how the various family members react to this situation, as well as how rapidly it spirals from a normal (if vicious) family argument to something much more serious and deadly, once the gun is produced.

She drew her lips together disappprovingly. "Because your parents are here."

Oh dear. I *so* see a massive internal meltdown in Mac's immediate future. This is really not going to go well, is it? Although, particularly in light of my own recent speculation about his past and his relationship with the folks, I am delighted at the opportunity to see how this all plays out.

In the third excerpt, I like the understated tension between Danny and his brother, and how Nate is very much *cop* in a way that Danny isn't. It plays particularly nicely in light of the first section, and other bits we've seen of Danny's past, and how the familial tensions have their roots way down deep.

Oh, and:

Oh, and this I wrote during Biology. It's okay, people were giving presentations.

I feel so much less guilty now over the fact that I spent the entirety of our mandatory health insurance meeting today writing more Fleet Week fic.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Oh, man. Val *is* a scary son of a bitch, and I really like how the various family members react to this situation, as well as how rapidly it spirals from a normal (if vicious) family argument to something much more serious and deadly, once the gun is produced.

Val kicks ass. Everyone should have one of their own. The family argument kind of developed on its own - I didn't expect Val to pull the gun, but he seriously dislikes Ned Messer, and Ned Messer isn't too keen on him either. It's a good thing Angela was there, because Val wouldn't have hesitated in shooting Ned.

And to think, he's restrained compared to most of the New York Mafia dons.

Oh dear. I *so* see a massive internal meltdown in Mac's immediate future. This is really not going to go well, is it? Although, particularly in light of my own recent speculation about his past and his relationship with the folks, I am delighted at the opportunity to see how this all plays out.

No. No, I don't think so. I'm thinking trauma and screaming and bloodshed myself, on everybody's parts. You know, "The evidence is against you, Judge Taylor," from Mac to his father; "Get out of my lab. Get out of my lab right now, you bitch," from Stella to Mac's mother; various snark and sympathy on Aiden, Danny, and Flack's parts.

In the third excerpt, I like the understated tension between Danny and his brother, and how Nate is very much *cop* in a way that Danny isn't. It plays particularly nicely in light of the first section, and other bits we've seen of Danny's past, and how the familial tensions have their roots way down deep.

Danny and his family do not get along. At all. Nate's actually a really decent guy, the kind of guy girls crush on in high school, but in Danny's eyes he's just Annoying Older Brother, even sixteen years later. It's like the Messer family skipped the "favorite child" thing and just went straight on to "most despised son" and "all the other kids rock" and Danny got the short end of the stick. Nate's not anymore a police officer than Danny is, but he's got the "vibe" that Danny doesn't. Of course, he was never a Tanglewood Boy and he never lived with Don Val Constantine, which might explain a few things...