limmenel, seriously, honey, you are an ENABLER

[bedlamsbard]

Just for you, I sat down and worked out how I'd do a season-long arc of undercover cop Danny. This isn't how I'd write a story, but it is how I'd plot a television arc. (Note that I don't actually have any idea how television is plotted.)



X.01
- Baglia Murder opens up a spot in Tony Taccetta's inner circle.
- Danny is approached by Migs Ruffalo -- "I knew your father; how's he doing?"
- Ricky Scarpa is arrested for Baglia's murder by Mac.
- (end of ep) Mac gets a visit from OCD captain.

X.02
- Danny fucks up a case badly; Mac yells at him in the hallway a la "Crime and Misdemeanor"

X.03
- Evidence from a case goes missing.
- Lost evidence turns up in suspect's car with Danny's fingerprints on it.
- Danny is fired for planting evidence.
- (end of ep) Danny is approached by Taccetta -- "So, Danny, I hear you're not a cop anymore."

X.04
X.05
- Life Goes On

X.06
- Drug-related case.
- Flack: "This stuff's been pouring into the city by the bucketload; OCD and Narco are going ballistic."

X.07
- Life Goes On

X.08
- Stella runs into Danny at a coffee place.
- Danny takes a Mysterious Phone Call and leaves abruptly.

X.09
X.10
- Life Goes On

X.11
- Hawkes and Flack pick up a case that leads them to an abandoned warehouse.
- Bill Pastore and Danny are packing cocaine upstairs.
- Pastore gets the drop on Flack, tosses his gun to Danny and orders him to shoot Flack.
- Danny shoots Pastore; tells Flack to arrest him.
- Flack claims he shot Pastore.
- In an interrogation room, Flack tries to tell Danny to turn it all around.
- OCD tells Flack to back off.
- (end of ep) Flack goes to meet Danny at some bar owned by Taccetta and tries to tell him to turn his life around.
- Danny yells about how the cops never did anything for him.
- Flack and Danny get into a fistfight; they're pulled apart by Danny's friends.

X.12
- Mac recieves Danny's badge and a packet of letters in the mail.
- Mac to OCD: "What the hell are you doing to my guy?" "He's not yours anymore."

X.13
- Life Goes On

X.14: "An Officer and a Lady" (1/2)
- Marine serial murder case.
- Female ex-Marine NYPD officers are turning up dead in the city, horribly tortured and murdered.

X.15: "Semper Fidelis Ad Mortem" (2/2)
- Continuation of X.14.
- Cloke disappears.
- Yamata comes in demanding the Crime Lab's help in finding her before she's killed.

X.16
X.17
- Life Goes On

X.18
- Arson case; CSU's involved because the DOAs were shot.
- Mac knows it's tied to Taccetta; he can't prove it.

X.19
X.20
X.21
- Life Goes On

X.22
- College student murder; daughter of New Jersey capo
- (end of ep) "Whack New Jersey" -- NJ capo and wife are shot on beach.
- Danny on the beach with blood spray across his face. (TBC, cut to credits)

X.23
- Mac, Stella, and Flack on beach for NJ capo case.
- OCD liaison.
- Clues lead back to Taccetta.
- Big Showdown -- "Danny, shoot this fucker! Shoot this fucker right the fuck now!"
- Surviving members of Taccetta circle are led out into the daylight; Danny is leaning against the side of the building with blood all over him and a gun still held limply in his hands.
- Danny's admission -- "I was an undercover cop for the OCD," to CSU.

See, the show could totally pull it. They just won't.

Comments

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

... if I could marry you, I'd get down on one knee right now.

Seriously, why aren't you writing for CSI: NY? Because crap, this is so much better than anything they could come up with. And they totally should do it, and they totally could do it, because fuck, they totally won't, and it makes me want to cry. Because they're unimaginative jerks and they can go beyond their normal unrelated-episode by unrelated-episode format, and they're incapable of dragging a story arc out for more than two weeks.

But god, this would be such a fantastic opportunity to explore the various characters, to really get inside their heads and see how they tick, and to explore exactly what holds the Crime Lab together, because they'd be able to do so much with this.

Ack. Even if you never write it, it's still absolutely fantastic. I think you should mail it to the CSI writers, because ngh.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Well, you are in Canada...

Because I'm a seventeen-year-old high school student from Middle of Nowhere, Washington?

Seriously, though, playing a little more seriously with this idea now, writing bits and pieces of it (X.14, at least the part where Danny calls Flack an "Irish cop bastard" and tells him to arrest him, and probably the end scene in X.23 where Mac gives Danny back his badge and Danny shoots Taccetta's second as he's handcuffed and being led away by the cops. Yeah, I'm going to make Danny crack), I can see how it would be hard to do with the show. For one thing, keeping the focus on the Crime Lab doesn't allow for the transgressions to Danny's story, so a lot of the stuff going on would probably come out of nowhere. I think it could be done, but it would be hard especially for that aspect. I mean, if the only way you can have Danny show up is by random interventions with the main crew, then it's not going to happen often in a city the size of New York. The other clues that are dropped might not necessarily ring as clues. I mean, a lot of the last ep deals with the enormous amount of strain Danny's under; the reason why might not be entirely clear unless you see his journey. On the other hand...

On the other hand, I'd be curious to see how the rest of the Crime Lab reacted to Danny's firing. And an addition of a scene into X.15 where Mac gets an anonymous envelope with Danny's badge inside and a couple of letters: "If anything happens to me, give this to my mom." "I don't know who else to give this to, so hold on to this [his badge] for me, will you, Mac?" which prompts Mac's call to the OCD, "What the hell are you doing to my guy?" "He's not yours anymore."

See, if I was writing for CSI:NY, we'd have plot arcs all over the place. It would be the Whedon-verse of crime shows.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

Yes, this is true, but my roommate's claimed first dibs if I suddenly decide to marry another woman, because she wants to flight benefits that I get from my dad who works for American Airlines (omg almost-free flights glee!).

Psh, I think you should be working there, anyways. If a kid can be a famous actor at age 6, then you can totally be a famous writer at 17.

I mean, if the only way you can have Danny show up is by random interventions with the main crew, then it's not going to happen often in a city the size of New York.

Except, of course, Danny knows where the Crime Lab is, where his co-workers go to hang out, etc, so it would be very easy for him to be in the same place they are, especially if it's within his comfort zone, like a certain Starbucks in a certain part of town that he's gone to every day for three years, or whatever.

I think the loss of Danny would (could?) slowly tear the Lab apart. He's not a central character, but he's a part of a whole, and taking that away would cause some major issues.

It would be the Whedon-verse of crime shows.

I'd like to see Joss write an episode or two of the show. It would be HILARIOUS.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I think you broke my heart. *single dramatic tear*

What, like Christopher Paolini? Bah to that, I say. Bah. I'd rather wait till I can write well.

Mmm, good point. (Which is probably how he runs into Stella.) On the other hand, he's probably going to be making a conscious effort to stay away from that part of town. These people know him way too well for him to be sure of his acting skills; the two times he really confronts them are at the Starbucks with Stella and the warehouse with Flack.

Mmm, good point (again!). Man, I wish we'd gotten more repercussions from Aiden's leave of absence, but I think Danny's getting fired in a VERY PUBLIC MANNER (on purpose, duh), would probably add to that.

Also: by the end of the season, Danny would have killed at least three people.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

I'M SORRY. WHAT CAN I SAY? I'm apparently in much demand. You can be Wife Number 3, though, if you want (c'mon, $150 round trip to London? You know you wanna! :D!)

By writer, I meant screenplay writer. Psh, Paolini, while entertaining, is not overly well written, in my opinion. Although, I have read some books written by teens that were fairly good. And I've read fic by teens that's AMAZING and should be published.

Even though he knows he should be staying away from certain parts of town, I think he'd get homesick sometimes. He'd be lonely, in pain (mental and emotional) and just need to be in familliar settings, and he'd probably thing "Nah, what're the odds", right?

I think Mac would suffer a lot of backlash, too. Doubley so, actually. On one hand, he'd face the Wrath Of The Lab for firing Danny, especially Stella (who would disapprove, of course) and Hawkes (who I think would find Mac's attitude totally hypocritical and really over-the-top, after Murder Sings The Blues). But he'd also have problems because he KNOWS what he's sending Danny into, and that would hurt him just as much as the anger of the lab, who thinks he really did fire him.

The killing people thing would probably push Danny into a really dark place.

I still think the big problem here is going to be Danny's decision to accept the under cover role. Because it would take something big to push him into that, back into the world he left when he left Tanglewood, and he wouldn't do that lightly. I think someone would have to guilt trip him Big Time, or he'd be emotionally unstable as a result of his brother or his father's death at Mob hands, or something, but otherwise I don't think he'd ever do it.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Oooh. You can have a harem.

Paolini burns. Seriously, he gives all of us young writers a bad name, and it pisses me off. I mean, okay, yay initiative, but Eragon was a novel that, as mistful said (http://mistful.livejournal.com/97690.html#cutid5), should "have been put in the famous trunk under the bed." When I was in eighth grade, it was okay. Now? Not so much.

Mmm, maybe. I think after X.14 he'd definitely start doing it a lot less, though, once he realizes the kind of danger he's putting his friends in. (Of course, that particular incident is pure chance, but it freaks Danny out. It also serves to alienate him from his friends.)

Oh, yeah, totally. I didn't think about that. I mean, granted, there's a lot of precedence for Danny's firing (which is all completely set up), and planting evidence is a lot worse than just thinking about tampering with evidence, a la Aiden, but especially coming as it is after Aiden, after Danny's previous screwups, after various other people's mistakes -- yeah, he's definitely going to get a lot of flak for something that isn't even his fault.

Add in to that that he knows what he's sending Danny into -- and he doesn't have a choice in the matter -- knows that Danny has a very, very good chance of getting badly hurt or killed on a whim... And, of course, this all gets even worse after X.14 and getting Danny's letters and badge in the mail.

Add in to this that the vast majority of the NYPD doesn't know that Danny hasn't really been fired, just Mac and a couple of the OCD brass, which reflects badly on the Crime Lab. Mac's already been targeted by people like Gerrard for the shortcomings and scandals surrounding the lab; if he fires someone else -- especially a screwup like Danny can be percieved to be -- well...more politics. And drama.

The killing people thing would probably push Danny into a really dark place.

I'm hesitating over this right now, but I don't think they were innocents. On the other hand, he knew all three of them -- and one of them he shot to save Flack's life.

I have the feeling it's basically the OCD coming down on him like a bag of rocks following the Baglia case -- they're working hand in hand with the Crime Lab, and once the captain or whatnot finds out Danny was propositioned by Ruffalo, he's going to do whatever he has to get Danny transferred over to the OCD. Danny basically doesn't have a choice in the matter, not if he want to keep his job, and this guy has more pull than Mac does, so there's no help there.

I am, of course, glossing over a lot of stuff that would probably be necessary -- Danny serving a prison sentence, for example; not hitting that.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

I'll move to Utah and practice bigamy.

I don't think it's so much the killing of people he knows that's going to bother Danny, but the killing in general. In fact, I think just having to carry a gun and use it is going to force Danny to totally re-analyze just who he is, because he's not comfortable with guns at all, as we see in the show, and yeah, he knows how to use one, but he doesn't seem to like them much at all.

I still think something big would have to happen, because Danny has his own rights, and he has Mac behind him, and if he doesn't want to go to OCD, he won't. But if the captain really lays the guilt down, he might be able to convince Danny to agree to it, and after he's agreed to it, he's stuck, even if he wants out later.

After everything that they put Danny through, would they really make him serve a prison term?

If you weren't writing this for TV, what would you do differently?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I don't think bigamy's actually legal anywhere in the United States today.

I think you might be right, there. I'm trying to remember Danny's reactions from "On the Job", and I can't. Of course, his reactions are going to be slightly different because he can't show that he's disturbed by what he's doing, not of he wants to keep doing what he's doing. And, by the end of the season, he would not be the Danny we know. (Also: there could so totally be follow-up in the next few seasons. I'm just sayin'.)

No, I think it really is a case of "If you want to keep your job, or avoid getting busted back down to traffic cop, you will do this." The OCD captain outranks Mac and Danny and Organized Crimes is in a lot better standing with the brass than CSU. It's not that Mac didn't fight for Danny's rights, but that OCD overpowered him, especially once they found out that Taccetta made a play for him.

Also, the OCD detectives? Are the most hard-assed, butt-kicking, shit-eating detectives ever. They're awesome. Mad amounts of love, and also, would make amazing recurring characters.

They'd make him serve the prison term before he went undercover, to add credibility. On the other hand, since he did get tagged by Taccetta while he was still a cop, a prison term would probably be overkill -- and way too obvious.

Oh, God, make me think. Um, give me a bit, I'll write it up in another post.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

Didn't say it would be a legal practice. But more accepted, maybe, except for the whole not-heterosexual non-Christian aspect of it. Hrm.

Maybe I just put too much faith in the police system, but it bothers me that they'd force someone to go undercover like that. You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, right?

I think you'd HAVE to be a hard-ass cop to be OCD.

Danny + guns is something I'll have to think about more. On the one hand, I think he could definitely carry one and not think about it, and he'd be okay with having to draw it to protect himself or those he works with. But actually using one in offense, not defense, would be a step that he'd have to think long and hard about taking, unless it was an act of utter rage and despair, in which case I think his emotions would totally win out over his reasoning. He's an emotional guy.

All they'd have to do is bring some stuff up from before the Academy... some charges that were buried from when Danny was in Tanglewood, little things that would add up, and that might be enough cred, proof that he's just as badass as the rest of Taccetta's group.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Eh, maybe we'd better all just live in sin. Oh wait, wasn't the point for the benefits?

...watch "The Departed." Seriously, it's not force it's just...coercion.

Also, once you meet OCD? You don't want to piss them off. See, this is why I'm glad I'm not writing this as a story; TV would totally just gloss over this part.

The two OCD detectives are awesome. Actually, they're pretty insane and they're both ex-Marines, but awesome. There's Yamata and there's Cloke -- she's tiny. She punches one of the Mob guys in the face and Yamata has to hold her back before she rips his eyes out with her fingers.

*cough*

I'll type up the two scenes from X.14 I've written later; you'll get to see Danny shooting someone, Danny yelling at Flack, and Yamata threatening to bust Flack to down to rescuing kittens out of trees.

Oh yeha, plus Danny's family -- "I knew your brother, I knew your father," etc.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

Yaye, sin! Good times, all around!

I'm going to, seriously. SERIOUSLY. I'm going to rent it on Thursday afternoon, because they'll be out of it if I go on Friday, and I'll watch it on Friday because there's NO CLASSES la la la.

I can't wait to see the scenes! Are Yamata and Cloke working under cover with Danny, or are they just his liaisons with OCD?

Yeah, and Danny's family would be more than enough, I think.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Yamata and Cloke are Danny's liaisons (the lingo is "handlers") with the OCD. They so totally could not pass undercover, although I'm tempted to give Yamata a background of three years deep undercover with the Yakuza, but that would just be mean. Besides, he has all his fingers. They're both Marines; they'd make bad undercover cops.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

Handlers. Ha, now I can see that pissing Danny off.

I love your OCs, they're always so interesting.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Oh, hey, they're actually pretty decent people, aside from the violence. I mean -- okay, they aren't Mac's Marine Corps. *smirk*

Thanks! OCs are fun.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

I have a feeling that Mac is, like, a kitten compared to these guys. :D

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, Mac has nothing Yamata and Cloke. There's a reason they're in Organized Crimes and he's a CSI. Cloke could probably kick his ass, and she's a chick.

[limmenel.livejournal.com]

Cloke could probably kick his ass, and she's a chick.

I think Stella would probably resent you saying that. Or, y'know, Astra. Or Aiden. Especially Aiden.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Gyah! You know what I mean. She's a tiny chick, at that.

Also, one of the scenes from X.14 is up.

[ladyprydian.livejournal.com]

Oh my goodness!

Wait ... I should introduce my self I am ladyprydian (obviously) and I am a friend of limmenel. She linked you and ... well GAH your plot arc is fantastic!

limmenel and I were just talking (we go to school together) and we both agreed that if this became a season of CSI: NY that it would be made of win.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Welcome! Thanks for the kind words (also, *blush*). I think it would be an awesome season (uh, clearly), but I can definitely see why the producers wouldn't do it.

[mybestexcuse.livejournal.com]

dude. just, dude.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I think.