Original fic, Boston

[bedlamsbard]

Anthony Zuiker is on crack, and not in a good way. He can't put the NY lab in a skyscraper! I don't care that if it's New York, if he puts the lab in a fucking skyscraper, I swear to God I'm giving Flack vertigo when I write fic next season. SWEAR TO GOD. Then come up with a good reason why they're not in the old lab. I LIKED the old lab.

On the other hand, original fic, from that homicide team in Boston, who may or may not be CSIs. I'm actually leaning towards "may not" at the moment, but that could change.



Chris shows up at his door at one o'hell in the morning in the middle of a fucking storm, where wind lashes the trees and sends rain flying hard as bullets against the windows. Jimmy wouldn't be surprised if one broke at the onslaught, just cracked and scattered glass all over his ratty carpet, bringing the storm inside to bed down with him. They say politics brings strange bedfellows; Jimmy never thought he'd end up sleeping with something just this side of a hurricane.

Chris clutches at his old Academy t-shirt with dead men's hands, gripping tight like blood and partners and loyalty. "Help me," he whispers. "Jesus, Jimmy, you gotta - you haveta - oh God make them stop, make them stop." He flinches like he's been shot and Jimmy digs his thumbs into his shoulders and drags him in out of the storm, where the wind puls the door shut behind them.

He's soaked to the skin in the few brief moments he's been outside. Chris is cold to the bone, shuddering and shivering with his t-shirt and jeans so wet they might as well be painted on. Jimmy tries not to look at his madman's eyes, but that means his gaze slides away to the purple bruises sunk into skin and bone and the muddy ghosts of handprints on his shirt.

Chris, Chris, what did you do?

The thought flickers briefly through his mind, and Jimmy tries to push it away but it lingers. Chris's face crumples and he steps back against the wall like avoiding a blow.

"Jesus, Chris," Jimmy whispers.

Chris puts his hands to his head. "Oh, God," he gasps. "Make them stop, make them stop, oh God help me - make them stop, oh God -"

Jimmy slids his palms over Chris's shoulders, feels his partner shudder into silence beneath him. "Chris," he says softly. "Chris - Jesus, Chris, look at me. Look -"

"I can't, Jimmy, I can't, I -" His eyes are screwed tightly shut, but he reached blindly out for Jimmy and knots his fingers in the damp fabric of his shirt. "Oh God help me, make them stop, make them go away, Jimmy please -"

There is a hint of alcohol clinging to his clothes, but he isn't drunk. Jimmy has seen Chris drunk before and this, this blind terrified <(insanity) paranoia, isn't it.

Chris's mouth moves in words Jimmy can't hear, then the storm abates for a moment and his words are clear. "Oh God, oh God, help me, God help me, Jimmy please, make them stop, make them stop, make them stop, Jimmy I can't, I -"

Jimmy digs his fingers sharper into Chris's shoulders than he means. "What? What, Chris? Tell me, so I can help you."

Chris shivers into silence and leans his head forward against Jimmy's collarbone. "God help me, Jimmy," he whispers. "God help me."

"Who hurt you?" Jimmy demands. My partner who hurt my partner don't you fucking touch my partner I -

I'll kill you.

Chris shakes his head against his shoulder. "Don't know, Jimmy, I -" He flinches again, like he's been struck. "Make them stop."

It's a plea, and Jimmy can't do anything about. The realization gnaws at him like cancer. I can't help my partner. Too often.

I can't help my partner.

He remembers Mac, remembers before a kiss, the slant of his mouth, the feel of him in the night, at his back on patrol. Remembers his first partner, his best partner, the man who taught him to be a cop.

Mac. God, Mac.

Remembers. Remembers the shots and the blood and the perp and Cahill yelling, "He's not fucking dead till I say he's dead!" at the paramedics.

My partner. God, can't help him, can't help my partner, can't -

Comments

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

...sweet *jesus*. Love this. High energy, and high tension, and completely sucks me in. Jimmy's fear, and everything that the sudden realization that he *can't* help his partner brings home to him. And the thing Cahill says, too. Not dead till he says so.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Jimmy's fear, and everything that the sudden realization that he *can't* help his partner brings home to him.

Jimmy has bad luck with partners. Bad, bad luck. But it's true because he can't help Chris, because the fight's inside - well, it's not exactly inside his own mind, but it's on ground Jimmy can't touch. You can't fight what you can't see.

And the thing Cahill says, too. Not dead till he says so.

I like tht line too. Cahill reminds me a lot of your Cooper, I think. Fun guy. Crazy.

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

But it's true because he can't help Chris, because the fight's inside - well, it's not exactly inside his own mind, but it's on ground Jimmy can't touch. You can't fight what you can't see.
There's something immensely powerful and fascinating about that concept, and that kind of theme, of not being able to fight what you can't see-- if only Chris can see what's trying to hurt him, he's the only one who can stop it. All Jimmy can do is be there to reassure him, at best.

Cahill reminds me a lot of your Cooper, I think. Fun guy. Crazy.
Cooper doesn't have the best of luck with partners, himself. I think that's part of why he's crazy (he took Stahl, the rookie he got when O'Connell got McMahon, worked and trained and crazied him into the ground, and Stahl ran away got himself transferred somewhere a little more sane.)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

There's something immensely powerful and fascinating about that concept, and that kind of theme, of not being able to fight what you can't see-- if only Chris can see what's trying to hurt him, he's the only one who can stop it. All Jimmy can do is be there to reassure him, at best.

I think Chris is a little amazed when he wakes up the next morning, that Jimmy didn't throw him out. Jimmy tried to help him, did his best to do what he could, but he couldn't really do anything. Although it would be nice if Chris could stop it, because right now it's sort of fading in and out. God knows what he'll do when he starts seeing things that aren't there, instead of just hearing them.

It is an interesting concept. Because - not just what you can't see, because how do you fight something that doesn't exist, that's intangible? You can't, not really.

Cooper doesn't have the best of luck with partners, himself. I think that's part of why he's crazy (he took Stahl, the rookie he got when O'Connell got McMahon, worked and trained and crazied him into the ground, and Stahl ran away got himself transferred somewhere a little more sane.)

*is amused* You know, I would crack up if Cooper actually ended up getting a rookie that could give him tit for tat, and ended up with an actual partner.

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

Jimmy tried to help him, did his best to do what he could, but he couldn't really do anything thing.
Jimmy's got *stones*, man.

It is an interesting concept. Because - not just what you can't see, because how do you fight something that doesn't exist, that's intangible? You can't, not really.
Right, it's not like fighting something like personal demons, or memories, and it's past even conceptual things like, "well, I'm fighting against injustice". Ghosts, or demons, aren't even something that most people would hear and *not* go "okay, you're on a one-way ticket to the loony bin there, fella". Kinda like that guy in the Twilight Zone with the gremlin on the wing?

You know, I would crack up if Cooper actually ended up getting a rookie that could give him tit for tat, and ended up with an actual partner.
*snorfle* Oh, god, yeah, that'd be... well, he'd be shocked when the kid didn't start cowering, and then dig through every trick in his routine and thensome. Probably end up having mad hot sex with the rookie because hey, he's put up with everything else, might as well reward myself try this as a last resort. And then he wakes up and rookie's like, hey, you got a cigarette?

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

And you're right, too. Zuiker. On *crack* A lot of it. What the hell, there, Anthony, did the writers give you some of their stash? Like a truckload? A fucking skyscraper? Forget this-- how many *precincts* are in buildings more than maybe 10 stories at most? (actually, that's a question, since it seems like most of them are older buildings, and hence fairly low to the ground.)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

If they don't come up with a reason why the lab is suddenly located in a skyscraper, I'm writing one into the Snafu-verse. I already have bunnies, except it involves the Patrisos blowing up the lab, which is...not going to look good in front of the Mafia Commission (which actually exists. Hurrah for research!).

By the way, have you seen this (And the thing Cahill says, too. Not dead till he says so.)? "The [CSI] writers are really twisted. ...Frankly, they trouble me a little bit. I think they are weird." Ah, Jorja Fox, you have no idea. AT ALL.

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

If they don't come up with a reason why the lab is suddenly located in a skyscraper, I'm writing one into the Snafu-verse.
Right. This lab *has* windows, dammit. They're glass. They're just industrial/school/institutional windows, so they let light in, but you've got no clue what's going on outside. It has plenty of windows. That's why Mac keeps ending up haloed backlit when he's hovering in his office. Zuiker, quit it with the crack, dammit.

"The [CSI] writers are really twisted. ...Frankly, they trouble me a little bit. I think they are weird." Ah, Jorja Fox, you have no idea. AT ALL.
*snorfle* I did see that. And dude, she really does have no idea. Did I ever mention that if I had a crime procedural set in Boston, I'd have a murder at the wedding dress sale at Filene's Basement. Hundreds of women eager for a bargain on a dress-- now *there's* a place to hide a crime.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Right. We've seen the windows. The lab fits with the astmosphere of the show. Fits perfectly, in fact. As does Mac's office. EVERYBODY LIKES MAC'S OFFICE.

*snorfle* I did see that. And dude, she really does have no idea. Did I ever mention that if I had a crime procedural set in Boston, I'd have a murder at the wedding dress sale at Filene's Basement. Hundreds of women eager for a bargain on a dress-- now *there's* a place to hide a crime.

*arches eyebrows* Duly noted. If Chris can ever get his head away from the crazy. Why is it I can come up with cases for the CSIs and not for my originals?

[mentalhygiene.livejournal.com]

EVERYBODY LIKES MAC'S OFFICE.
Even Mac likes Mac's office. Leave the man his goddamn fishbowl, people.

Duly noted. If Chris can ever get his head away from the crazy. Why is it I can come up with cases for the CSIs and not for my originals?
Apparently the sale is an annual event. And I don't understand the appeal (that'd be the Y chromosome kicking in) exactly, but apparently designer gowns for low prices = large crowds waiting at doors, which have been broken in the past. And they come in and *strip* the racks like a school of piranha. It's been clocked at 36 seconds. That'd be Chris putting his head *in* the crazy, I think, or maybe a different kind of crazy.

[http://users.livejournal.com/stellaluna_/]

Really like how all of this works together -- the storm, the fear, the maybe insanity or maybe something else, and the helplessness in the face of it all. I particularly like the "first partner, best partner" line, and (like mentalhygiene), the "...till I say he's dead" line.

And I have been similarly cranky about Zuiker's remarks.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Really like how all of this works together -- the storm, the fear, the maybe insanity or maybe something else, and the helplessness in the face of it all.

He's sane, I swear. But I wish he knew that. It's a bunch of things Jimmy can't fight, and that in itself scares him. He's a fighter, but what do you do when you can't fight? He can't stop the storm, he can't push away Chris' fear no matter how he tries, nor can he do anything about the possible insanity, and it makes him helpless, and he can't fight that.

And I have been similarly cranky about Zuiker's remarks.

Zuiker is on crack, but the bad, bad kind.