*facepalm* on the bright side, the Petaverse now has a title...

[bedlamsbard]

Oh my God, I totally want to write the Petaverse scene where the Pevensies (and maybe Eustace and Jill, I don't know) go back to Peta's Narnia to rescue Rilian and find out Caspian's still alive, he's just being held captive. (The Prince in the Tower! I make my own fun.) So obviously Peta and Peter go in to rescue him, and then there is some making out on Caspian and Peta's behalf while Peter stares at them and realizes, "Shit, I actually fell in love with this woman," and then there is fighting, and Caspian and Peta have one of those hilarious sci-fi/fantasy/adventure married fights that's basically Caspian saying, "I told you to leave Narnia! I didn't say come back!" and Peta yelling, "You idiot, do you think I would just leave you here? I can't believe you threw me out of Narnia! Of course I came back!" all while fighting and trying to pick the locks on Caspian's chains.

Caspian: "I said, 'Don't forget me!' I didn't say, 'Bring an army!'"
Peta: "You bastard, 'Don't forget me!' means, 'Come back and rescue me!'"
Caspian: "It obviously meant, 'I love you! Save yourself!'"
Peta: "And what, leave you here to die?"
Caspian: "If it meant you were safe!"
Peta: "YOU IDIOT! 'Don't forget me' is a stupid thing to say, and it obviously means, 'Go find help and bring it back!' Doesn't it, Peter?"
Peter: "Practically an engraved invitation." *kills something*
Peta: "OBVIOUSLY. You're such an enormous bastard, Caspian."
Caspian: "I just wanted you to be safe!"
Peta: "And I would rather die fighting, you idiot!"
Caspian: "And I would rather you live!"
Peta: "Do you want me to leave?"
Caspian: "NO!"
Peta: "Good, because wild horses couldn't get me out of Narnia again." *they kiss*
Peter: *fighting* "A LITTLE HELP HERE WOULD BE APPRECIATED."

And then Peter is melancholy, because he and the rest of the Pevensies have to leave Narnia again, and also, he's still in love with Peta, which he totally doesn't get, but whatever, and then Peta grabs the front of his shirt and kisses him, then kisses Caspian, and then there is sex. Obviously.

And then Peter and the Pevensies get stuck, I don't know, hopping variations of Narnia for the rest of their lives. Or something.

It would be a happy ending, at least. Contrary to popular opinion, I don't have a philosophical opposition to happy endings.

(Also, Peta and Caspian arguing about who left the lights on in Cair Paravel in the middle of a fight while Peter kills things in the background and goes, "Thank you God I never got married." HOW IS THAT NOT HILARIOUS?)

Comments

[almostinstinct.livejournal.com]

Your brand of crazy. I think I like it.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Crazy can be awesome.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Peter kills things in the background and goes, "Thank you God I never got married." HOW IS THAT NOT HILARIOUS?
except at this stage isn't Peter married to PETA?

Furthermore, that sounds AWESOME, although so does the one where Peta and Peter end up in *PETER'S* post- PC world.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals?

Oh, he is! I forgot that when I was typing, although there's also the moment where Caspian stares at Peter and goes, "Who is this?" and Peta goes, "He's me from an alternate universe. And he's my husband. But mostly the first one." Peter: "Oh, thanks."

Wait, Peter's post-PC world as in England or Narnia? Because they come to Peta's post-PC Narnia from Peter's post-PC England, and is this really as confusing as it sounds?

[realpestilence.livejournal.com]

My first thought was "Narnia would have an embarassment of riches, bond-wise!" *laughs*

There'd be Peter and Peta, tied to her; and Edmund and Caspian, tied to *them*, in however many variations you'd have...two Edmunds? Two Caspians? At the same time, or one at a time? *blinks*

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

But Peta is shocked because Peter's bond is so much stronger, and then Narnia is confused because she bonded with Peta, but here's Peter, and oh my God, what is going on?

Well, at this point, all the Petaverse Pevensies except for Peta are dead. So you have Caspian and Peta, and then you have Edmund and Peter, and then there are Peta and Peter, which may or may not count.

Frankly, I'm saying headaches all 'round.

[lyamainu.livejournal.com]

You didn't kill Caspian! Yay!!!

"Caspian: "I said, 'Don't forget me!' I didn't say, 'Bring an army!'""

I think I'm in love with this Caspian.

And poor Peter! He's in love with a country and himself. That doesn't bode well for his mental stability. Except that it makes sense.

Totally.

Well, kind of.

If you don't think about.

And, y'know, just read it for the sex and snark.

And sibling interaction.

And other "s"'s I can't think of.

But it totally-sorta-halfway-maybe not- makes sense!!

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

:P

BWAHAHA. That would be entertaining.

Peter's post-PC Narnia. With the pron. No, it's not all that confusing if you concentrate.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Also I LOVE that Peter and Peta share random mannerisms- like that engraved invitation line. It makes me happy.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Peter never gets into his post-PC Narnia, at least not with Peta. (Otherwise, though, we might be getting somewhere, but it's not this, uh, non-existent story.) *arches eyebrow* There's Narnia V.3.0, the one where Caspian never had the horn and thus never called the Pevensies back?

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

What was the one you'd set the threesome in?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Well, this could not be the ending. I'm still in debate whether to write the story, let alone end it like this or with Narnia V.3.0.

Caspian and Peta are so cute fifteen years later that I think I'm getting cavities writing them. Except for the part where I broke Peter's heart in a dozen different places. Uh, whoops.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Well, they are the same person, except in all the ways they're NOT.

(Peta: "You could stay, you know."
Peter: "You know I can't."
Peta: "Yes, I do. I'd do the same thing."
Peter: "That's why I know.")

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

oh, god. that's horrible.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Well, there could be one in V.3.0, although that Caspian has no prior experience with either Peter or Peta, but if I do a return to the Petaverse, then there will definitely be one.

(I don't even want to think about Warsverse Caspian's reaction to Peta or Peter/Caspian/Peta.)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

What?

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

That was Peter telling Peta he's leaving Narnia, wasn't it? Or was it an invitation to teh sex?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Yep, Peter telling Peta he's leaving Narnia. (Or they could both stay in England -- well, you know what I mean -- and become safari guides in Africa! That's option two. Only then Peta never gets reunited with Caspian, and their love is pure and true and so sticky-sweet that I think it gave me cavities. Peta's version of saying "I love you": "You Telmarine bastard, I thought you were dead. I'm going to kill you. How dare you do that to me?" Caspian's version: "I love you." Peter: "If you two aren't too busy, I'm going to rappel out this window and escape now.")

I'm assuming you saw the two pieces of Petaverse in the prompts post?

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

ah, no, actually.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Here (http://bedlamsbard.livejournal.com/268545.html?thread=1597441#t1597441) (Caspian ties Peta up) and here (http://bedlamsbard.livejournal.com/268545.html?thread=1599489#t1599489) (Peter brings Peta back to England).

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Oh, and here (http://bedlamsbard.livejournal.com/268545.html?thread=1600257#t1600257), Peta, Edmund, Susan, and Lucy the morning after the cave-in.

[franceica.livejournal.com]

You seem to break Peter's heart so often that I really don't know I want to cry or muster some courage to accuse you. *sniffs*

Peter has enough headache as it is for being in love with Narnia. And then now you make him fall in love with himself. *sniffs some more*

Although, these all make a very bizarre sort of sense. *stares* I couldn't believe I just said that.

[lyamainu.livejournal.com]

But he has Narnia! He'll get over himself (literally), and remember his awesome country!loving!

Because I'm pretty sure Narnia would get jealous if Peter really fell in love with someone else. He's hers first, foremost, and always.

And I would NOT want to have a magical country mad at me for stealing her man. Really. Unpleasant. Think of all the billions of ways she could kill you!

Trapping you inside a cave!

Sic'ing the talking-tree-army after you!

Have an earthquake when you're on the edge of a cliff!

Get Cair Paravel to lock you inside your closet for all eternity!

Send Peter to kill you!

*has nightmares*

[swift-tales.livejournal.com]

*screams*

Hoozah! For the Peta -verse. I'm really all for the actual writing of the fic, totally. Because there is so much fun and crazyness and crack in this verse, it's awesomeness all around. But if the Pevensies (Peter's) keep hopping around different Narnia's for the rest of their lives (and saving it for the rest of their lives) How many versions would you actually make? And how long would they stick around? Until they saved it, or would stick around for a while, have a vacation until they go to the next one?
Also.... girl!Edmund, Boy!Susan and Boy!Lucy?

[franceica.livejournal.com]

He will get over himself

*laughing hard*

About the falling in love with himself part, I kept thinking it will be so much more amusing if it is literally himself, as in, male, "Peter" from some other Narnia, or something. That must be a spectacular sight. *laughing hard again*

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I just want him to have a happy ending and yet I can't. I blame Lewis. Peter will never have a happy ending.

We have reached a bad point where being in love with yourself and being in love with your country are basically the same thing. *shakes head* And makes sense.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Why do you think all of Peter's engagements ended so badly? The ones that lived are the lucky ones. (Especially the one who ran off with her childhood sweetheart. I mean, that's as good as it gets. Smallpox, get thrown out of Narnia -- for three of them -- lying, killed by Peter...no wonder everyone swore up and down that Peter was cursed.)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I don't know if the Pevensies going from Narnia to Narnia is a happy thing or the most depressing thing ever, because it's never their Narnia. (And then they find the Narnia where they never left and their descendants are still ruling a thousand years later...somehow this manages to be depressing.) God, Narnia is a tragedy in seven acts.

No, because the names would kill me, and I don't think I'm that good at characterization.

[swift-tales.livejournal.com]

You have a point about the Narnia thing, it probably would get depressing after a while. It'd probably be tons of fun to read, but the Pevensies would get depressed after a while. Although, how awesome would it be if they could travel between Peta's verse and Peter's verse at will? Like they open some sort of portal, ... Do you think there'd be two (infinite) Aslan's? Or just one who controls all in his endless poker game with Tash?

How many Narnia's do you think Aslan would destory and turn into Aslan's (Stepford's) Country?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

It gets depressing at the beginning, because each one is a Narnia, but they can never go back to their Narnia.

I vote for just one Aslan. *scowls* Aslan and Tash and all the gods of the Narnia world, all of whom are as real as the others, even if none of the others ever gets mentioned in canon. Sometime I have to write one or more of the Pevensies witnessing a god showdown between, like, Aslan and the seven westron gods or something. Maybe I can work it into the amnesia fic.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Can y'all even think about how hard that would be to write? I mean, do you refer to one of them as "Pete", or use one of his sobriquets (Bittersteel, Breakneck, Fire-eater, etc.), or what? I mean, "the other Peter" gets old fast, and I don't think our Peter's the type to call someone else "Pevensie."

[realpestilence.livejournal.com]

Right, I forgot you killed off Peta's whole family. That simplies things, to *some* degree!

I'd think Peta would count her blessings that her bond with Narnia *is* much weaker than Peter's. Watching Peter and Edmund, it might give her and Caspian reason to re-consider doing the full ritual themselves; which would result in much the same situation in your other vers (crippled bond between Caspian and Narnia), but for a better reason than Caspian being a bitch. *coughs*

And you'd still have their kid, Rilian (Riley!)...in this case, not half star-blood, but still with a much closer relationship to Narnia than his parents, who just might not have told him everything he needs to know about the bond to do it right...and the devolution of the royal line would continue until you get to Tirian. Etc. *nods*

Workable. But yes, headaches all 'round!

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Sure, except for her emotional trauma and Caspian and all of Narnia's confusion! (But a hell of a tactic, though, if the Telmarines are expecting all the Pevensies to be dead. Ghosts!)

Well, Peta and Caspian have already done the full ritual; she got him drunk and sprung it on him after their Telmarine wedding night. There were two weddings, one with Telmarine traditions and one with Narnian traditions. Of course, Peta was already pregnant, but -- her bond's weaker than Peter's by a lot, so the ritual didn't have as much impact. Just on Narnia rather than on Peta and/or Caspian, I think, which isn't bad -- bondings like Peter's are really rare and really dangerous -- it's just not what would necessarily be best for Narnia. But Peta fights the bonding, and Peter doesn't.

And she's terrified to see how Peter's affected by the bond, and how Edmund just takes it in stride when it spills over, and she thanks her lucky stars that she didn't end up like Peter, because now she can see how badly he's screwed up by it; it's something that's less obvious in England than it is in Narnia, even if it's not Peter's Narnia.

[realpestilence.livejournal.com]

I did read some of that, I just don't remember everything. How the hell do you keep it all straight?!


Hmm...I wonder. If Peta was already pregnant when the ritual was done, how would that affect the baby, if at all? He'd be born with Narnia already in his veins and in his (forming) head. Sort of.


Yeah, in England, Peter's just a moody bastard. Easy to pass off as war trauma, being pissy at not getting to soldier, too much responsibility for a boy, etc, whatever they want to think.

But in Narnia? Damaged as hell. Peter's thoroughly fucked and Edmund? Well. The more I think about being a sort of add-on minder/sex toy/companion/prop, the more I cringe at the thought. It's like a 2-for-1 special in their fucked-upedness!


*is disturbingly pleased by this*



I wonder why Peta fights the bond so hard? I mean, did she have mentors who explained it better to her; is it the fact that since she *is* female, it's already weaker to begin with and so she *can* fight it; is she less flexible or empathetic by nature? What? *speculates*

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

God damn IE, I just lost the majority of a very good comment.

I don't think it would affect Rilian. After all, he's not bonded, and Narnia may want to get Peta pregnant so there's an heir (and Rilian was conceived in what was most likely a weak variant of the fertility ritual -- open field, post-battle, hallowed ground, blood of the enemy), but I don't think she gives a damn about Rilian personally, just like she doesn't particularly notice Susan or Lucy except as people that Peter cares about.

And in England, the Pevensies are just one more damaged family in a country full of damaged families, and it gets worse when Papa Pevensie comes home from war and Peter heads off. Anything off about him can be written off fairly easily -- after all, between LWW and PC, who knows how long it was since Mama Pevensie saw her kids? And would the Professor have noticed?

And in Narnia, the scariest thing is that Peter's fall from grace was so gradual that it was almost impossible to see while it was happening -- and then someone blinked and the Peter that they knew wasn't the Peter he'd been ten years ago. Which would have happened anyway -- only there's a fairly large part of him that isn't really Peter any more, and in some ways he's as mad as the forgotten kings of old. (I foresee Edmund and Narnia having a conversation sometime. Not sure when, but I bet it involves trauma. And possibly the time-traveling mirror.)

And Edmund -- Edmund is his brother's keeper, and his bodyguard, and his second-in-command, and he's not his brother's lover, but he knows better than most what Narnia does to Peter, because he's the only one Peter trusts to see it. And Edmund's one of the more stable of the lot, but that's not saying much.

*waves hand* Partly the female thing, partly she is less flexible, partly she's less duty- and honor-bound than Peter, partly she's not in love with Narnia the way Peter is.