things that one probably should not say loudly in a disney store, or maybe at all

[bedlamsbard]

"OH MY GOD, if Ben Barnes kisses boys I will just die."

"We could talk about gay porn some more!"
"...there's an employee right behind you."

"That's not Narnia! That may say Narnia, but that's not Narnia! That's not William Moseley! And those characters aren't even from Prince Caspian at all! ...I think they're from Lord of the Rings. WHAT THE FUCK, DISNEY?"

"Is that lion supposed to be from The Lion King?"
"No, that's Aslan."
"...that's so wrong."

"Look at this pillow! I could sleep on Aslan's face, or on Caspian's face!"
"...that's so wrong."
"Yes, it is."

"This is a broken snowglobe and I just cut myself!"

"Oh my God, it's Mickey Mouse in black and white! It's a stuffed Mickey Mouse in black and white!"

"THAT IS SO WRONG. Caspian does not wear green ANYWHERE in the movie. Help, help, Disney's making inaccurate products!"

"I KNOW NARNIA, GOD DAMN IT."

*blinks prettily* I was at the mall yesterday. Turns out one of my fellow WriMos, who also lives in my hall, is into fandom too. We had a spirited discussion about it on the way back from the mall, while my non-fandom friend asked questions like, "What is slash?" and "What the hell are you talking about?" and "You know I stopped listening a while ago, right?"

...I feel sorry for the bus driver, because we were talking REALLY loudly until she stopped at the other mall to pick up more people, then we quieted down but kept talking about slash fandom.

I also now own one (1) cute shirt, and by cute shirt, I mean something that I really should stop calling a skank top, because that's totally not what I mean and yet I can't think of any other way to describe it.

Comments

[starsimpulse.livejournal.com]

dude, i wish my mall had a disney store. then again, im kind of glad it doesn't because i think i would live there.

"We could talk about gay porn some more!"
"...there's an employee right behind you." this nearly made me spit out my drink. XD

also, what does said cute top look like? *is nosy*

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

The sad thing is, THAT REALLY HAPPENED. I was the one warning her about the employee. (You should have seen said employee's face.)

It is low-cut, spaghetti straps, blue plaid, um...I ran out of descriptive terms for clothes.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

*dies laughing*

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

*grins brightly*

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

You live to entertain, right? ;)

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Hey, gems like this need to be shared, and I did only say about three-quarters of them.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

*eyes your description above*

blue plaid.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

IT IS CUTE OH MY GOD. Do I need to post pictures here?

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

If you want me to believe that blue plaid is cute, possibly.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Seriously, it is cute! (http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b176/bedlamsbard/PICT0347.jpg)

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Oh, DARK blue plaid. For some reason I had an image of baby-blue plaid, which was distressing.

Also, NOT AT ALL SKANKY you strange woman.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I know it's not skanky. But you are talking to the girl who will almost never wear anything other than a t-shirt in public. (This is going to have to change; I live in New Orleans.)

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

ahaha, ok... heat and humidity going to force a costume change on you?

Mind you my best friend, kayloulee lives on the mid-north-coast of NSW (humidity never got below 80% last summer) and you never see her in anything but a t-shirt.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Well, it's November, so chances are I'm not going to be wearing it until spring, but I may at some point want to go out, and I really don't own anything other than t-shirts and blouses.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's right, you people and your upside-down seasons...

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Our upside-down seasons? Your upside-down seasons!

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Nonsense. I am not upside down, so clearly YOU are :P

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I believe I am rightside up, thanks muchly. *beams*

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

*glowers at you* hmph. That's what YOU think.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Perhaps it is all an illusion and we are BOTH wrong?

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

I've heard rumous about some illusion-creating thing called Gravity, but I'm sure Aslan doesn't approve.

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Just a theory! Like evolution!

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Caspian does not wear green ANYWHERE in the movie

Wasn't his pretty nightgown thing that he was wearing in the final scene some kind of green?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Yes, but this was supposed to be his brigandine! Even teetiny action figures should be able to manage that.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Green *is* the canonical Colour of Narnia...

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

This is movieverse. What is this canon you speak of?

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

just saying, maybe they took it into their heads to consult the books, strange as that would be for Disney...

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

Yes, but they are action figures from the movie.

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

i have seen that pillow. it is fucking CREEPY.

i own a stuffed donald duck in black and white, which is not creepy and is actually adorable. <3 donald duck!

sounds like awesometiems. one time my friend and i camped out in a cafe for, like, A MILLION YEARS talking about fic and fandom and shipping people we knew, and one lady had to be like, "uh i am here with my family," and our waiter was like, "my shift's about to end, do you want to pay the bill ever?"

'prince caspian' (for realz!) by phish?!

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

IT IS.

there was also a pc t-shirt; it had two rhindons and edmund's sword, someone who looked NOTHING AT ALL like william moseley, and a bunch of characters from lotr.

WHOO. talking fandom with people in the know is SO MUCH FUN. even though we aren't in, like, remotely similar fandoms. (except for hp, everyone comes from hp.)

i have heard of that! but i have not heard it.

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

everyone DOES come from HP. i couldn't make that friend see why narnia is a worthwhile text.

I ADMIT, after the PC movie came out, i was in the children's section of the department store looking for narnia t-shirts. BUT. THEY WERE ALL IN BABY-SIZE?! all the other fantasy movies have t-shirts in regular size! omg do they not think people my size want to wear narnia t-shirts?! (answer: no.)

this one time i bought a star wars t-shirt at a factory rejects outlet in indonesia, in which anakin skywalker SUSPICIOUSLY looked like james van der beek... but i guess what can you expect, from such a place. but at least it was my size!

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I was trying to explain why I considered movieverse to be better than bookverse. It was not going well. (This is the same friend who wouldn't see PC because she hates Susan.)

They had ONE Narnia shirt! And it was all boy's sizes.

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

did you explain that susan is AWESOME in the movie and that's why there is more of her?!

why is there not a movie about the one year in england between LWW and PC :(

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

she also hates anna popplewell's lips, apparently.

because it would consist mainly of peter beating up people?

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

because it would consist mainly of peter beating up people?
this is not a selling point?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

excellent point, excellent point. but not really enough to base a movie off of.

have you seen the new merlin yet? (seriously, they should just call this show "camelot", it would make more sense.)

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

OMG I AM MAKING A POST OF FLAIL AS WE SPEAK

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

although i must admit i am disappointed about the thing that they changed that is a big point in the myths! you know what i mean, i think.

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

yeah, i think that was why i didn't figure out who it was until, like, ten seconds before the revelation. even with the episode title and all. but also i was drunk, so i was not in an overly analytical humor.

HEY. MERLIN/MORGANA? ARTHUR/MERLIN/MORGANA?

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

I figured it out as soon as the dragon dropped his IT IS DOOM speech.

YES PLEASE.

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Yes, but then every time someone said "have you seen Camelot", everyone ELSE would chorus "it is a silly place!"

[bedlamsbard.livejournal.com]

*snorfle*

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

It's only a model...

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

THEY MAKE ME PUSH THE PRAM A LOT.

Oh god, watching merlin is going to have me quoting that movie all the damn time

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Let me have just a little bit of peril?

[lassiterfics.livejournal.com]

No it is far too perilous!

[ineptshieldmaid.livejournal.com]

Bet you're gay.


(Oh, SNORT. Speaking of Lancelot, this was the best hour I spent this year...)